My personal story - Part 2 : There is no authenticity anymore

I was watching the movie Letters to Juliet on TV last Friday night. 

It’s not so much about it being a romantic movie (life is not holistically like that, but it would be nice to have some memories you want to capture in a bottle and preserve forever). It’s not even so much that part of the movie was set in a location I hold dear: a Tuscan village on the outskirts of Siena.

It’s a movie that displays the values of kindness, respect, gentleness, family, love and dignity. 

Does our “modern” society, with its big city lifestyle, conspicuous consumption, reality TV with relationship “experts” pitting people against one another for ratings, social media and its “influencers” and trolls, consider these old school values? Or forgotten values? 

Given how we meet and date these days (online dating - like shopping, swipe left and right, ditch and repeat), the lack of safety for women that political leaders still don’t really care about, the shallowness and lack of respect many men show women, despite awareness campaigns, they are forgotten values. Misaligned values. That’s been my experience, repeatedly (I can only refer here to my own experiences). 

Today is Valentines Day. Readers can watch the TV news for how our modern society celebrates this day. But is any of this grounded in the foundation of values I mentioned above? Is there real commitment, loyalty and trust? Is there authenticity?

Pope Francis said,

“[The good of the family], consists in sharing relationships of faithful love, trust, cooperation, reciprocity, which brings about their happiness. The family humanises people through the relationship of 'we' and at the same time promotes each person's legitimate differences.”

See Vatican News. (2022, 29 April). 'Pope Francis: Rediscover the value of family life.' [Online]: https://www.vaticannews.va/en/pope/news/2022-04/pope-francis-rediscover-the-value-of-family-life.html

I do agree with the quote above. I believe a family unit, united in the foundations and values already mentioned, will go a long way to solving the disease of narcissism and indifference. No wonder we have another serious issue on the increase : loneliness. This is not a healthy society, but a very lonely one.

What defines a family, who makes up a family is not what my argument is about. And the issue of domestic violence, of unsafe, toxic, unhealthy family dynamics, is a big problem and not the focus here either. When the essential values mentioned above are missing or forgotten, it can result in great dysfunction, or worse, violence that place lives at risk. In any dangerous situation, I pray that those affected leave, for their safety and wellbeing. 

But in many cases in our society, exits and “break-ups” happen for superficial reasons. Have we been affected by too much reality TV, or has this always happened but it’s become worse? This really is a “disposable” society. But these are people being trashed disrespectfully. Someone’s child, sibling, friend, parent, colleague. This is de-valuing and disrespecting another human being, without remorse and compassion. It is unconscionable.

I’ve decided to write about parts of my personal story, interspersed in posts about the systemic and institutional psychological thriller of my professional story. There are some things that now need to be said. 

I’ll start sharing some parts of my personal experiences on 25 March. It’s a significant day, as I reflect on my own family tree and ancestors on Greek Independence Day. 

In the meantime, I’ll continue writing about the professional side of my life, where I was forced to play strategic war games against a network of power abusers. That should never have happened, nor is it a fair fight for an employee, who just asked for agreed boundaries to ensure a safe work environment. Where are the values of respect, dignity, kindness, commitment and trust by leaders in this context? 

Where is the authenticity in our society?

As for dating apps…

A joint 18 month investigation, published yesterday on The Guardian:

'Rape under wraps: how Tinder, Hinge and their corporate owner chose profits over safety.' https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2025/feb/13/tinder-hinge-match-investigation 

A view from the Tuscan village of Montalcino